We all face embarrassing moments with our children which might happen privately or worse even publicly. And here the dilemma settles; what would you do and how are you supposed to react?
As in all parental issues and crises, one should work on the patience factor. Have the whole thing well digested before the reaction takes place. However, there are a few tips that might help avoiding embarrassing situations like tantrums in the mall or swearing at the table etc…
1. Having the same say: When both mom and dad have the same say, the child knows that he cannot fool around and get one of their approvals. So when mom says NO, the child knows that daddy won’t say YES.
2. Being firm about your decision, where you make the child realize that you won’t change your mind simply because he started to cry. Tell him, “Does crying change anything?” or “You know that when you cry nothing changes.” A nice method I have come across is “Asked and Answered” strategy where you tell your child that he has already asked for something and your answer was clear. That’s why, when your child comes back with the question whether he can buy that extra toy, you can simply say, “Asked and answered.”
3. Having your child confide in you where he can ask about taboo issues, like cursing and other sensitive topics. Let them know that they can come to you for help. Once the words are clearly explained to them, they know that they should not use them. This goes directly to step 4 where you have to be the role model yourself.
4. Avoiding cursing in front of the children is the best way to teach them not to use that language. Children copy their parents in everything they do. Preaching does not play the major role in raising well rounded and polite children. In fact it is how you speak, act, and behave in your daily life - with them and with others - that make the whole difference. When we as parents curse all the time, what do we expect from our children to do?
These tips will not guarantee the fact of not being embarrassed. However, your action will lead to their reaction. At the end of the day, it is you who decide what you want from your child and based on your actions, the child reacts. If that child needs the attention, they know how to get it – and mainly they do it in a negative way.
So when my child throws a tantrum in public, do I ignore him, or I punish him, or do I preach? I think that once you are in that awkward and uncomfortable situation, you need to count till ten before you react in order not to make the circumstances worse.
I am still looking forward to reading some of the situations that you might have had. Together as moms we can always learn from each other.
N.B: Pictures are taken from Pinterest